Friday May 4th: If I'd thought to do this when we first decided it was time we finally took the plunge, I wouldn't now be trying to catch up on the last five weeks' worth of planning things, booking things, and telling people. Oh well; in chronological order, as far as I can remember:
Thursday March 29th
My birthday: we were on holiday in Cornwall during that week of amazing weather, and we'd spent the day in the Lost Gardens of Heligan; perfect. Decided to eat out at a very nice fish restaurant in Fowey (one of the great things about Fowey is the number of very reasonable restaurants within walking distance), and it was during the stroll back to the apartment, talking over things and things, we thought, do we want to go on as we are, or shall we get married? Took us about two minutes to decide we rather thought we'd like to get married. Well, we've been together twenty-something years - why hang about any longer?
Friday March 30th
Woke up feeling slightly stunned! I suppose the whole thing might have been shelved indefinitely, except that we'd always said if we ever did decide to get married, we'd like Tom to do it, or at least to be involved as far as possible, and we were going to stay with Tom and Debs in Bideford on our way home, so we'd have to tell them.
Saturday March 31st
As usual when the four of us get together, a good deal of eating, drinking and making merry went on, and it had got to nearly midnight and we still hadn't told them. Eventually, we grabbed a moment to confer when both Tom and Debs were out in the kitchen - do we still want to do this? Yes, we do!! - and when they came back, Jules broke the news to them that we'd decided (after all this time!) to get married. Their reaction was pretty much the same as everyone else we've told so far - they were absolutely delighted - which was very touching. We then asked Tom if he could/would officiate, and he immediately got all brisk and business-like, and we discussed possible dates, venues, people to be involved, and I started to feel as though we'd set a huge boulder in motion that couldn't now be stopped! Not that I'm saying I'd want to, of course ...
Left Bideford having settled it that we would go and see our local vicar, and get back to Tom about possible dates - looks like mid-August or early September.
Sunday April 8th
Easter Sunday. Went to mid-morning Communion, and waylaid Michael Williams (who was busy handing out mini Easter eggs to all and sundry) and asked if we could make an appointment to talk to him. Appointment duly made for Tuesday morning, April 17th.
Tuesday April 17th
Although an occasional communicant at St Dyfnog's, I'd never had cause to visit the Vicarage before. It's set in a splendid location, up above Llanrhaeadr overlooking the Vale of Clwyd - the views are stunning. Add to that the fact that there were various feline decorations, so Michael must be a cat-lover, and we felt we'd come to the right place! Michael was very reassuring; we discussed times, dates, people - best man, witnesses, someone to give me away - form of the service, music, and when the banns will be read. The form we have to fill in for the banns includes a section for our ages on the day we get married - bit disconcerting to think that I will be 59 and Jules will be 70! We also discussed Tom's involvement - it seems he can certainly take part, though he can't actually marry us, as that has to be done by the local incumbent, in order for us to be legally wed. Available dates seem to be second half of August, September up to and including the 7th, then October onwards.
Music: Michael said that the church organist can manage simple stuff but not a lot else, so it seems I'll have abandon my ambition to walk out to Transports de Joie - it doesn't sound as though he could cope with Messiaen!
I spoke to Tom later the same day; our first choice would have been Saturday September 1st, but he's marrying somebody else that day! Previous weekend, which includes Bank Holiday Monday, would have been a possibility, but maybe many of the people we'd like to be there would already have arrangements to do other things? Weekdays September 3rd-7th are also possible. Tom said he'd go away and talk to some people about when he could be away from duties in Bideford, and come back to me.
Saturday April 21st
I was starting to get twitchy, but fortunately Tom called early on Saturday morning. Friday September 7th it is! Definitely irrevocable now!
Time to make lists: who's Best Man, who's going to give me away, who are witnesses, who else do we want to invite. I think we both felt from the start that we didn't want it to be a huge event - not appropriate at our age, and in any case, we couldn't afford it. Thirty, maybe? Some ideas about Best Man and someone to give me away, and one of the witnesses should definitely be Norma - we know she'll be absolutely delighted about us getting hitched at last!
What am I going to wear???!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Sunday April 22nd
Llandudno Closed Tournament. I seized the moment while setting up the hall at Y Morfa to tell Peter that Jules & I had decided, after all this time, to get married, and to ask him if he'd give me away. I have never before seen him so completely lost for words!!! He didn't have his diary with him (and he's hopeless without it), but said yes, provided nothing clashes.
Jules was talking about calling Frank to ask him to be Best Man, but we were pre-empted by Petal calling me, just to say hi, how were things. Checked she was sitting down and had a drink in her hand (yes to both) and told her - much delight and congratulations (she said she didn't see it coming!) then we passed our respective phones to Frank and Jules, at which point Jules checked Frank was sitting down, had a drink in his hand, and had just taken a generous gulp (yes to all three) - more delight and congratulations.
Frank and Celia, if/when you get to reading this, we would both like you to know how touched we were at your reaction to our decision to get married. The four of us have been friends for more than thirty years, and to be honest, if you'd been unable to make that date, I think we'd have had to change it!
I think I might have found a clothe, on-line; emailed the link to Petal, and she thinks it's a possibility too - Morrocan silk kaftan, in the most gorgeous colours. Well, there was no way I was going to get married in white!
Tuesday April 24th
Peter confirmed he'd checked his diary and there was no clash of dates. He was also expressing thanks and talking about being honoured, so clearly he'd recovered his composure and was back to taking the p*** as usual. Very reassuring.
Thursday April 26th
Called Stan this afternoon, to see if he and Lyn are free on September 7th. They are; more or less totally stunned, like everybody else so far, but once he'd recovered, the first thing Stan asked was, did we have a photographer? We do now, and about the best we could have asked for. Thanks, Stan - it's really good to know we'll have someone on the day who will do an excellent job for us. Just wonder, in view of the time it took you to get round Bodnant, if you'll have enough space on your Flickr account ...
Friday April 27th
Down to Cardiff, for Jules to umpire at the Grand Prix event, and staying with Norma, of course. Her hearing aid had stopped working, so she was relying on lip-reading a good deal, so Jules told her she had to watch us very carefully, as we had something to tell her that she wouldn't want to miss. No problem, and I think she's more excited than we are! The kaftan arrived in the post this morning, so I took it with me; Norma likes it too, so I think I'm probably sorted. That was easier than I expected!!
Norma is going to make the cake for us (though we haven't yet worked out how we are going to get it to North Wales, if she comes up by train ...)
Wednesday May 2nd (yesterday - nearly there!)
Hair-dressing appointment this morning. I've instructed Adrian that he cannot be on holiday on September 7th, and he's promised he won't be, so that's another thing sorted!
Called in on Rhian and Alun on our way back from Rhyl. It's a while since we've got together, so a fair bit of catching-up to do, such that it was half an hour or more after we'd arrived that we got around to telling them about the Grand Decision. Alun wanted to know why we were rushing things ...
Down to Brookhouse Mill just after 7.00, to talk to Karen about the reception. It'll be upstairs in the conservatory, which will be a lovely venue, and holds up to thirty, which means we won't be able to over-run on numbers - probably a good thing! Karen was wonderful - very pleased for us, and full of helpful ideas for the event, including contact details for someone we can talk to about flowers. It's only recently occurred to me that of course, I'll need something to carry, even if it's only a single rose (though Jules was absolutely adamant that I couldn't just pick one from the garden and wrap the end in tin-foil ...) More things to think about ... She's suggesting a tasting at some point, and says also that if I want to bring Stan over some time before the day, to look at photographic possibilities, that's absolutely fine.
Called June & David later in the evening - yet more delight and congratulations, and they can make the date too. This is all going far too well ...
Friday May 4th
It's today, so I've caught up! Everything from here on in is in real time!
